Sunday, 17 November 2013


Jamila's family is originally Lebanese, but she grew up in the Ivory Coast where her dad ran a few businesses. When war broke out, her family packed up and moved to Senegal, but Jamila decided to go to Bordeaux, France for university, where she took genetics and biochemistry. During her summers she worked on a vineyard (her family is Maronite, so wine is totally cool) and became interested in the biodynamic production of grapes. Since graduating, she has been working on breeding cows that have larger horns for burying manure. In her spare time Jamila is planning her wedding to an up and coming Galician performance artist named Manolo.

Friday, 8 November 2013


Biff went off the grid in 1996 in anticipation of Y2K. After living with the Amish for two years, he built himself a compound in the Saskatchewan hinterland and lived off the land, awaiting civilization's imminent collapse. He attracted a number of followers, and he established himself as "The Divine Disciple of the Righteous Path". On January 2nd, 2000, Biff found himself alone in the world. He thought he might cash in some secret investments, but the lawyers of three of his former followers discovered these, and they have been secured by the court to pay support for Biff's seven children from his time as cult leader. He is now back on the grid, lives in Winnipeg, and sells fro-yo at the mall.